I boldly declare that I am the most attractive man in the world.
It takes a pretty self-confident man to make this kind of a declaration and I just happen to be such a man.
At this point you may be skeptical of my claim. To show you that I'm right here's a picture of me.
I know, right? You're thinking "how does he handle being so attractive?" It's been both a blessing and a curse my entire life but you learn to deal with it.
Let me defend my position. First, I am married to the most beautiful and amazing person that has ever walked the earth. Therefore, while I recognize that I am not her equal, I must be near her perfection and level of physical attractiveness, otherwise fate would never have allowed our union to happen. Here's her picture so you know that I'm right.
Second, Cami (my beautiful and amazing wife) tells me several times a day that there is no one more attractive than me. She is not only beautiful and amazing, she is a woman of integrity so I know that she can't be lying. She would feel too guilty all of the time if she were lying, therefore, it must be true.
Third, we have the cutest kids ever! With four children, statistically speaking, if I were not the most attractive man in the world then at least two of our kids would be "less than the cutest" because half of their genes come from me. However, just look at them! Cami and I are obviously the most attractive people in the world.
Would anyone like to argue with me? I didn't think so.
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