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Tuesday, January 21, 2014

My Wife is Like a Moose

Huh. Maybe that wasn't the best title for this post. I hope Cami doesn't get mad at me. We'll know soon...

Anyway, my wife really is like a moose. Have you ever read the book If You Give a Moose a Muffin? There are other variations of it like If You Give a Mouse a Cookie and If You Give a Pig a Party. The story basically follows the many and complex consequences of a single action, such as giving a moose a muffin.

For example, if you give a moose a muffin then he'll want jam. If you give him jam then he'll want another muffin. It goes on and on from here.

I came to the realization a short time ago that my wife is like a moose. I can't just give her a metaphorical muffin without her expecting more. Then if I do that she expects something else.

She often asks me to just come and talk to her while she does the dishes or is cooking. I love talking with Cami so I go and pull up a stool. Within two minutes flat I find myself drying dishes or cutting up olives. Again, I have no problem helping and, in fact, love to do so it just amazes me how quickly and seamlessly I find myself doing more than just spending time next to her while she works (which is what she promised I would be doing).

This got me to thinking. How often am I a moose with a muffin? Quite often actually. With me it's not doing things around and outside that house that I "suck" Cami into helping me. For me it's scratching my back or giving me a massage. I will often strategically choose my seat, often on the floor in front of the couch where she is sitting, to increase the odds that she'll just spontaneously give me a massage.

Other times I will ask that she just rub the back of my neck for a minute. Twenty minutes later she's still going because as my neck gets loose then my shoulders feel tight and when they loosen up then it's my back, and so on and so forth. I'll have to write a book, "If you give a man a massage..."

I'm not saying that this is a bad thing, I just hadn't realized that she was a metaphorical moose before (and that I am too). I've known for years that she's just a like a moose when it comes to the children (moose are incredibly protective of their young, to the point that they will kill to protect them). She's like a moose in that she is very territorial. She is also like a moose in that she has a large and beautiful rack.

So the next time your spouse asks you to "just come and sit with me" beware. You might be giving a moose a muffin.

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1 comment:

  1. Ha, this is too hilarious! What an analogy, and it's so true. Thanks for the laugh this morning.


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