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Friday, July 27, 2012

T.E.E.

I believe that marriage is between a man and a woman, that it was and is ordained of God to be that way, and that therein, lays the greatest happiness available to men and women. In other words, I assert that the greatest happiness in this life is achieved through marriage and the relationship with your spouse. Therefore, we should invest the most into this relationship; the most time, the most effort, the most energy (T.E.E).

The most time. Take a day this week and keep track of everything you did and how long you spent doing it every thirty minutes. Then the next day tally up each activity and the total amount of time spent on it. If spending time with your spouse, or doing nice things for him/her, isn’t in the top three rearrange your priorities. Take a half an hour to sit and talk with them, go on a walk, watch a movie together, or do the dishes/take out the trash. Doing this daily is the best investment you will ever make and will pay the greatest dividends.

The most effort. What was the last thing you did for your spouse? How hard was it for you to do? All of the things we do for our spouse do not have to be herculean but regularly we should do something that is to show them our love. Perhaps you’ve had a really long day and are exhausted. One of your children begins to cry late at night after you are in bed. Make the sacrifice and go and put them back to sleep (especially if this isn’t something you normally would do). Is there a project that your spouse has been trying to get to but hasn’t yet found the time? Do it for them or help make sure that they have the time to tackle it.

The most energy. Planning ahead to demonstrate your love to your spouse requires energy. It requires forethought and planning. It requires diligence and patience. My wife is notorious for somehow guessing what I am going to get her or do for her on her birthday and our anniversary. What I have learned to do is create a plan A, B, and C to make sure I can still surprise her. Only once has she guessed all three. But this takes considerable energy on my part. I have to be three-times as creative and plan for three different possibilities. On the flip side, the smile on her face, the giddy giggles, and the light in her eyes when I succeed is worth every ounce of energy invested (and I then have extra ideas for the next time).

I love my wife. She is the most amazing person in the world. I would do anything for her. My job, and all of our jobs, is to make sure that first, we feel that way about our spouse, and second, that our spouse knows it. Now, go show them.

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